Finding the Best: How to Select A Camp to Fit Your Child's Needs

Candace Braun

Whether you have an outgoing child with a thousand interests and not enough time to explore them, or a child who's quiet and reserved, with no clear interest in any one area, there's a camp out there to satisfy his or her needs. But what kind of camp should your child go to? An overnight soccer camp in Europe? A basic day camp down the street from your house?

"The options are many, and it can be hard to narrow down the field on your own," said Helaine Isaacs, the Central New Jersey consultant for Tips on Trips and Camps, a free service that offers advice to parents on choosing an overnight camp for their child. There are many things to consider when choosing a camp, including distance, cost, length of time, camp size, coed or single sex, and if the camp is religion-based.

"Be clear on what experience you want your child to have.... Clearly not every camp is a good fit for every child," she said.

Costs can range from $700 to $1,100, according to the consultant, with the shorter camps costing more per week than the longer ones. Overnight camps typically range from two to eight weeks, and many full-season camps are seven weeks, with three-week sessions for half-season camps. However, some of the full-season variety will also allow children, particularly younger ones, to come for half the time.

Ms. Isaacs recommends children attend for a minimum of two weeks: "It can take that long to get over the initial homesickness, and to settle in and make friends."

For children who are attending camp for the first time, parents should look for one that has a reputation for being nurturing. For example, some camps have a "Camp Mom" to make younger participants feel more at home.

Attending camp unaccompanied by friends can help children build confidence, giving them the experience of going to a new place on their own. According to Ms. Isaacs, however, it's best to send them with a friend, than to not send them at all.

Why Choose Overnight?

Ms. Isaacs's Tips for Trips suggests that there are several advantages to choosing an overnight camp, rather then a day camp. Staying overnight will build self esteem in children by helping them demonstrate their ability to live on their own and deal with situations independently. It will also help children develop a sense of accomplishment, by overcoming fears and meeting challenges.

Children usually have a fear of the unknown, and the best way to deal with comments such as "I'm not going" is to educate the child on the overnight camp and what it has to offer. Overnight camps can expose children to new activities and interests, and help them create lasting relationships with other children, said Ms. Isaacs.

Children start going to overnight camps as young as eight years old, but nine or ten appears to be the best age, depending on the child's maturity, she said. Parents should also be careful if they are sending a 12- or 13-year-old to camp for the first time, because in those camps where the same children come back year after year, the child could feel alienated if he or she is the only newcomer in a group of old friends.

"That's a very tough situation for a camper to go through," she said.

When it comes to selecting a camp, parents need to consider their child's needs and what kind of environment would be most beneficial, said Ms. Isaacs: "Some children need a competitive environment and some need something more laid back."

Preparing to Go

In preparing a child for camp, parents should communicate confidence in their decision. However, if they begin to have misgivings, they should talk with a spouse or friends, and try to not convey their doubts to the child. Try to avoid statements that might make a child feel guilty about leaving the parent, such as, "I'm going to miss you terribly," said Ms. Isaacs.

"It's really important for the parent to be clear that this is a good experience for the child," she added.

Parents should refer to positive experiences the children have had in the past when they were staying overnight at a friend's house, or taking an overnight trip with Boy or Girl Scouts. Having them stay overnight somewhere close to the start of camp can also help prepare them for being away from home.

Opening communication with a camp director is key, the consultant added. A parent should let the director know if the child is prone to homesickness, or is having difficulties due to problems at home, such as divorce or a serious illness in the family. Parents should also ask the director how they may get in touch with a camp counselor to find out if the children are enjoying themselves, particularly if this is their first time away from home.

Talking with the director is similar to talking to the principal or dean of a school, said Ms. Isaacs, as "they have a vision for the environment they want to create." This is where parents will get the best sense of how the place operates.

Parents should make sure they can keep in touch with their child, either through letters, emails, or phone calls. Giving a child pre-addressed, stamped envelopes or postcards should encourage them to stay in touch. Sending a letter that will be waiting for them when they arrive at a camp can also ease homesickness, said Ms. Isaacs.

When writing to a child, she added, don't send so much detail about life at home that it could make them feel as though they're missing out on something. Parents should resist overreacting to a child's homesickness and not offer to pick them up from camp, or say things like, "If you don't like camp, you can come home."

If a child seems to relapse into homesickness on Visiting Day, parents should be accepting of their feelings, but also express confidence that they'll get past them. The situation isn't that different from when children cry the first day of school as their parent leaves them, but have a good time once they adjust to the situation, said Ms. Isaacs.

Most importantly, parents should try to enjoy themselves while their children are away at camp, either by spending more time with their other children, or by making some time for themselves.

"Make this time a special experience for you, in addition to the one you're giving your child," said Ms. Isaacs.

For more information on Tips on Trips and Camps, visit www.tipsontripsandcamps.com.